disbelief or discontent?

you stand infront of the mirror, you dig into your soul, ponder over the things that you can't understand and, finally, give up the spirit that keeps you from losing. is it the belief that you can't hold upon, or is it that you are not content with the status you have achieved? is one leading to another and running in circles? or, am i losing a good frame of mind? this is sick... when you start to loose confidence, cringe on any thought of jumping ahead, shed any possibility of standing for your ethos, you know you are fucked.

gotta get more into dream theater...